You've tried the charts. And the consequences.

"Put on your shoes, we have to go." He's building Legos. He doesn't move. You say it again. "No."

Reward charts, taking things away, natural consequences: all of them happen after the big feeling. The moment where he needed help was earlier, before "no."

The one-page guide

What "put on your shoes" actually asks, where to help before the big feeling, and how to find the exact step where your mornings come apart.